How to deal with ending a relationship

[Jewel]

How do you deal with the end of a relationship? Do you get over break ups easily, or does it take you time?

[micheal]

It depends on the situation. Not all situations are the same. It all depends on the person as well.

[shinningstar]

Based on my own experience, it took a year to heal my broken heart. I think it was normal because it was my first time to experience heartaches. Now, I already know how to handle myself.

[ken7700]

Ending a relationship is very tough and in reality their really is no easy way to do. Every person handles it different so ending it can be done many different ways. No matter how you end it usually is never something pleasant.

[cindy23]

Its going to take time but remember to take care of yourself and do things for yourself so you can heal. Get a massage or pedicure, go for a walk with a friend and then have lunch. Find a new book to read. Remember to focus on yourself and enjoy life!

[debrajean]

It depends on your feelings for the person. If by the time you break up, the two of you have already drifted apart, then I think it would simply be closing the door on something that didn't fit. But, if one or the other of you had deeper, more committed feelings, then the breakup could be devastating.

[katharina]

Originally Posted by Jewel

How do you deal with the end of a relationship? Do you get over break ups easily, or does it take you time?

Back when I was going through things like that, it depended on what exactly the relationship was. I guess looking back, that's a good indicator about which relationships were more serious... like if someone's over it by the weekend, it probably wasn't very serious.

[justontime]

If the relationship had been important then of course it would take time to get over it. As well as the loss of the friendship aspect of the relationship there is also a loss of confidence and self esteem and it takes time to feel OK about yourself again.

[SolarStone1977]

Well depending on the type and length of the relationship some are easier to get over than others. I think all agree that time is the key factor in getting over a past love and to increase the recovery process (minimize time required to get over ex) its best in my opinion to remove any traces of them from your life. It's always a bad idea to keep lingering photos, letters, emails, IMs, gifts, etc. stored as they will always be a reminder of the past. Also, picking up a new hobby/sport is a great idea to keep your mind from wandering and occupy your time. Depending on the type of person you are going out and meeting new people helps. It's also good to cut off contact with your ex's friends.

[justontime]

I can understand why it is not helpful to hang on to items and friendships from a relationship in an unhealthy way, but I don't think it is a good idea to try to wipe all traces of that relationship from your life. It happened, it is part of your history and you have learned from it, trying to blot it out sometimes makes the hurt and the memories more powerful than they need to be.

[Taggart]

I agree that each situation may be different, depending on the people involved.

In my experience, I still have at least mild feelings for two relationships that ended when I was much younger - One was ended by me and the other was ended by the other person.

One of these was at the very beginning of the relationship and the other was after about a year of intimacy. I agree that time does help.

["all in"]

trusting and loving someone to realize after almost 9 years, that things were not what you thought, is hard on the heart, but devastating to the soul. It puts you in a place that you fight daily to get out of. Your self worth begins to be a fight within yourself, and who you thought you were is no where to the person you so desperately now want to become. I`m not even sure if any of this will make sense to anyone else by myself. But yes my heart is broke, my trust is gone, yet my soul is in desperate need of soaring.

[Febregas]

I am not an emo guy. That is why i dont care. Just put the past in trash and get the future in your backpack . . . (:
http://thecampbootcamp.com/

[coolmum]

I was in a relationship for 14 years, married for 12 of those years, when my husband left me and started dating my friend after about 6 weeks, they moved in with her about 2 weeks after that. It made me feel like my whole relationship was a lie, my self esteem is low and no self confidence. That was 3 years ago. I meet someone else that made me feel special, treated me right. Now I have recently ended that relationship because I just dont feel I've been fair to the relationship. My self esteem is gone again, I just want it back, I want to be happy again, but it's been so long. Will I ever be happy, will I ever find that special someone. I'm sure he is out there, but where.