i have a history of depression and i tried to get help.ive had already 3 counselers and im only 14.it was so bad lastwinter that i was thinnking about killing myself(but i knew i would never actually do it) anyway my back was killing me so i stayed home 4 about 5 days and on the 5th day when my back felt better i left the house with my mom and dad and i felt bored.anyway i get home and my mom had her back turned and i just had a thought about me snapping her neck.but the thing is i love my mom so much i cant even describe it.and i know i would never actually kill her and i dont want to.but now i fel depressed and scared and im so scaqred to even look at my mom anymore.......SO PLEASE I ASK U.....has any one else EVER had these kinds of thoughts or is it just me....am i going crazy or is it just depression plz help me i cant look at my mom anymore........