I'm in a nightmare and i'm not waking up

[macabrelights]

I'm 21 and for the past 2 months i've had health problems popping up that doctors aren't taking as seriously as they should (besides the CT scan i had today) it started with the headaches weird headaches that occured every single day, I went to a doctor and he asked me question and basically said nothing, my doctor went on vacation just got back this monday. my life has gone to hell since then i'm getting random pains in different areas of my body, my vision is blurrier then usual my leg feels weak and has a strange feeling in it, i've been constantly constipated went to the doc for a pain in my penis and he told me i had blood in my urine. every doctor i've seen has told me my symptoms are too spread out... but thats not the case for cancer now is it... thats when i got thinking i have some kind of cancer and its already spread and i have the thougt of dying in my head every day which always leads to me crying, i've had to get out of work a number of times for pain or crying, i'm on antidepressants but they aren't working... somebody please give me a sence of serenity i think i'm dying and it is a nightmare, its affecting my relationship with my girlfriend and my 6 month old daughter... I hate my life so much right now to the point where they are starting to hate me